Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Workin' for the Weekend

Hubby just returned from a seven day business trip to India.   Since I am the primary caretaker here at home (the CEO of the BoyMommy Household, if you will . . . ) things aren't THAT different when he's gone, but knowing he's on the other side of the world and that I will not have reinforcements is a bit disconcerting.  Again, I give a humble shout-out to single moms and military wives everywhere.  

I took the boys to visit their grandparents, who live 3 hours away (and whose visit requires a stint on Interstate 95, grrrrrr,) and rushed back home on Sunday only to find out that baseball practice was cancelled.  Then school was cancelled on Monday because WINTER WILL NOT END.  EVER.  Then I had Small home with me all day Tuesday because when the public schools have a two-hour-delay, Small doesn’t have preschool at all.  During that week I also fit in a museum visit, a pediatric "well" visit, and an allergist appointment which required a prescription pick-up at the grocery store.  Of course the medicine was unavailable so I had to return to the grocery store the next day with all three of the boys . .. my absolute favorite thing in the world to do, right after bathing suit shopping and toilet plunging.

Luckily I have a girls’ weekend to look forward to, and it’s happening in 2 days!  Hubby asked where we’re going. . .

“I don't know.  Wintergreen, I think?  Or Massanutten.  I don’t know.  Someplace,” I responded, providing about as much information as he had going IN to this conversation.  I had said all along that we could go to the Super 8 on Route 1 for all I care, so really, location is arbitrary.

“When are you leaving?” he asked.  A logical question, since he will be in charge of our offspring in my absence.

Hmmm.  I shrugged.  “I’m not really sure.  Friday sometime.  3?”

Frustrated, he asked, “do you know anything?  You don’t know where you’re going or when you’re getting there.”

“I know I’m gettin’ the hell outta Dodge,” I answered. 

I NEED this weekend.  I just need a little break . . . a refresher weekend in which I can take a deep breath and regroup. 

“What are you going to do?” he asked, and I know the response he wanted was something along the lines of braid each other’s hair, make prank phone calls, and then have a pillow fight in our skivvies. 

Alas. . . “drink beer and sleep.”  The girls have already planned for adequate beer consumption, and I have notified them that if anyone wakes me at 6 AM, I will “scratch your eyeballs out with my own hands.”  I think I made my point.

I understand Hubby's concern, of course.  'Member in college, when you'd be hungover on Saturday morning, but ready to go again on Saturday night?  Not so much any more.  Now I can have two glasses of wine on a Friday night and have a headache all day Saturday, OR I can have one martini and be home and in bed by 10:30.  

Funny (well, funny NOW) story:  I went on a girls' weekend years ago, on which I had a tad too much to drink.  There was karaoke.  I can't help myself when I'm belting out Dolly Parton tunes.  When we got home from the bar, I promptly relieved my stomach of all of its contents.  I was a bit lacking in the coordination department, however.  I leaned my head forward over the bowl of the toilet just as the seat was coming down, which led to an unfortunate bruise in the middle of my forehead.  On Monday morning, I had to lie about how I got the bruise because I couldn't tell a class full of high school seniors the truth.  

Man, that was a fun weekend.

Saturday, March 8, 2014

Ugh. I'm going back to bed.

The Needy McNeedersons are at it again.  Within the first half hour of being awake this morning:

  • I'm hungry.
  • Help me put these in the bag.
  • Have you seen my wallet?
  • Where's my cell project?
  • Who drank all these beers?
  • Can you put the straw in my juice box?
  • I can't get the tv to work!
  • I need you to update this baseball roster.
  • Remember?  From the Lego Movie?
  • Can you read me a book?
  • Can I watch another Scooby?
  • What did you do with the other bag?
  • I'm thirsty.
  • Can Michael and I have a sleepover?
  • Watch this!
  • Look!  I took your picture while you were sleeping.  
    Here.  I brought you batteries.
    Now do it!  Do it now!
  • Can I play outside?
  • Where's the remote?
  • Whose underwear is this?
  • I need the tunnel!
  • It's Talking Tom. . . .
  • The red car's not going fast enough . . . can you put some more batteries in?
  • Come look at my cytoplasm!

I'm going back to bed.  Y'all can fend for yourselves.