Medium broke my computer. Lucky for him, I've done some research, and I think it's going to be a quick fix. (For the sake of his survival, I certainly hope so since his daddy is reading about it here for the first time.) It still works, just not to its full capacity.
I don't think Medium understands the value of a dollar. He certainly doesn't understand the value of $3,000, which is about how much it would cost to replace my computer.
Large is headed to his tour of the middle school today.I’m not ready.It makes my stomach hurt to think of my baby
going to middle school . . . partly because I want him to remain my little boy,
and partly because I remember what a freak show middle school was.
I was so awkward.My
jeans were always too short because I was growing faster than my mom wanted to
go jeans shopping.I had braces … and a
haircut that could only be deemed “unfortunate” … and hairy legs because my mom
wouldn’t let me shave them. And the
hormones.Dear God, the hormones! It was not a good time in my life.
I don't mean to brag, but I was a size 0. For about two weeks in 1986.
Anyhoo, this is the conversation Large and I had this
Large:I have my
middle school tour today!
Me:It makes my
stomach hurt just thinking about it.(It
will be important for him to tell his future therapist that he felt guilty for
growing up because of how it made his mother feel.Totally healthy.)
Me:I want you to
stay my baby forever!I want you to stay
in elementary school!
Large:Mooooom.I’m gonna go to college.And meet a pretty girl.And buy a house with her.And have kids with her.
Me:(look of panic.)
will still live with you.
Remind me of this conversation in 20 years when my
30-year-old middle child is living in my basement.